Spanish Made E-Z: Useless Lesson #1

Really gets me, these ads for language courses where you learn by looking at a picture and memorizing a phrase to go with it. Problem is the phrase is practically useless, one you'll probably never use your entire life!

"El caballo salta" (The horse leaps). Come on, how many of us are going to need a phrase like that unless we are explaining something about a cowboy movie we just saw! So continuing this useless tradition, and depending on popular demand, I offer my own version of useless Spanish phrases:

• "Perdon, tienes una mosca en tu frente." (Excuse me, there's a fly on your forehead)
• "La vaca esta bailando El Mambo" (The cow is dancing The Mambo)
• "Hay un guzano verde en tu Menudo" (There is a green worm in your Menudo)
• "Tu hijo tiene grandes orejas" (You're son has big ears)
• "Mi maestra esta bien dormida y roncando" (My teacher is fast asleep and snoring)

Well, let me know how your Spanish is progressing. Hasta la vista, Vaya con Dios and all that stuff!